Pamperec to a Pulp was the sixth episode of Season 9 of Roseanne, also the 203rd overall series episode. It was written by Stacie Lipp, and was directed by Mark K. Samuels. It originally aired on ABC-TV on October 22, 1996.
Roseanne and Jackie's spa trip subjects them to a strict diet, acid peels, skin toxins, and exhausting hikes.
Armed with lottery money, Roseanne and Jackie get the deluxe treatment at a beauty salon, including seaweed wraps, facials, waxes, and yoga. While undergoing a past-life regression, Roseanne believes she used to be Xena Warrior Princess.
- Roseanne as Roseanne Conner
- John Goodman as Dan Conner (credit only)
- Laurie Metcalf as Jackie Harris
- Sara Gilbert as Darlene Conner (credit only)
- Michael Fishman as D.J. Conner (credit only)
- Sarah Chalke as Becky Conner (credit only)
- Tammy Faye Bakker as Make-up Lady
- Colleen Camp as Jill
- Jonathan Emerson as Yoga instructor
- Kathleen Freeman as Seaweed Attendant
- Ken Kells as Ken
- Andrea Marcellus as Spa Patron
- Christy Martin as Christy
- Todd Oldham as Himself
- Sharon Oml Chima as Seaweed Girl
- Ahmet Zappa as Waiter
- Moon Unit Zappa as Carol
- Sarah Krasner as Todd Oldman's Fashion Model (uncredited)
- Despite being credited, John Goodman (Dan Conner), Sara Gilbert (Darlene Conner), Michael Fishman (D.J. Conner) and Sarah Chalke (Becky Conner) do not appear.
- This marks the first episode where only two main characters appear in a episode.
- Ahmet Zappa (waiter) had previously appeared in the Season 6 episode "Busted", playing a different character.