Pilot Lights & Sister Fights is the eighteenth episode of Season 2 of The Conners, also the 29th episode overall.


Dan is finally ready to share his feelings with Louise, but it could be too late. Darlene balances the stress of wooing potential advertisers and doctor's appointments as she realizes how badly she wants a baby. Ben gets caught up playing handyman and babysitter for Becky, which has him miss an important meeting and causes Darlene to pick a nasty fight with the both of them.



At the last minute, Dan grabs the bouquet and decides to give it to Louise despite her involvement with another man. He tells her that he is finally ready to pursue another relationship after being married to and losing Roseanne. Unfortunately, Louise is not thrilled. She does not forgive him for being unwilling to commit to a relationship for an entire year. She is unwilling to begin another year of the same thing. After she tells him that she left Dan, she refuses the bouquet.

Laurie Metcalf says The Conners is recorded in front of a live studio audience.

Ben has his beard again, and he is watching "Man Versus Bear" on television. Becky is awake comforting her teething infant. As Becky and Ben enjoy the television and take turns with Beverly Rose, Darlene wakes up wondering where Ben went. Ben says that he was tired of her snoring and was unable to wake her up. Becky and Ben decide that Darlene's dream of fighting an Otter would be excellent for television. They ask her to write "Woman Versus Otter" but Darlene comments that it will take too long for them to have a baby together if Ben does not spend more time with her. She goes back to sleep by her self.

Dan is still at the night club where Louise performed. He will stay in the hotel nearby for a while. Marla the bartender gets suspicious and tells him that based on safety regulations, it is time for him to leave. Somebody from the band introduces him self to Dan. His name is Zach, he is the band's keyboard player, and is the new boyfriend in Louise's life. Zach says that he has known Louise for a while, and they decided to get together. He is oblivious to how much Dan loves Louise, assuming that he is a crazed, drunk fan. Zach and Marla assume that Dan is talking nonsense every time he attempts to tell every body that he still loves Louise. But Dan persists even if he can not stand up and walk.

At the kitchen, Harris comments about Darlene's fertility pills. Herris starts talking about Climate Change, but Darlene says that the new child is between Darlene and Ben. Even if Darlene says that she will "recycle when they are done with it", Harris says adopting is much better. Darlene says not to worry as it is unlikely that she is able to give birth. Ben finally wakes up and says that old people do not care about destroying the Earth if they are not going to live much longer. Darlene tells him that they are going to be late for their meetings. Ben explains that he was with Beverly Rose all night because she was worn out. As Darlene insists that Ben gets ready or they will be late, Becky says the same thing. She asks Ben to stay and fix the water heater. She begs him to fix the water heater immediately, but that makes it worse. Becky falls apart facing the reality of cold showers.

Jackie mocks Dan for being desperate about Louise. She continues after Dan says that he met Zach but sympathizes the moment says that it is over. Jackie says that if he freed himself from Roseanne, and if he can free himself from Louise, he will be able to have a completely new relationship as long as he stops thinking about Louise. Dan says that Jackie's advice is pointless since she is divorced. Jackie says that Dan's situation is worse because he is still wearing his wedding ring. She also says that it is simply taking it off and putting it away, not throwing it away.

After Jackie cheered him up, he walks in the kitchen to find an angry Darlene because Ben disappeared. Dan is afraid to give any advice. Harris is doing laundry and says that he is in the basement. Darlene goes to the basement to confront both Ben and Becky. She accuses Becky of sabotaging the water heater and stealing Ben before running upstairs. Darlene says that Ben wanting to have a child is more important than Darlene herself. Ben says no, but that means that Darlene wants a child more than he does.

As Dan is watching the bear contest, an angry Louise knocks on the door. Apparently Zach honored Dan's request and told Louise about him. Louise says it is more mature to say it to her face. Even though Dan finally said that he is not good at expressing himself, she notices that Dan took off his ring. After they mock each other, Dan kisses her, and she stays.

Becky walks towards Darlene and says "I am going to the refrigerator to get some juice. It does not mean I am trying to have sex with Ben.". Darlene cooked waffles for Becky as a form of apology as well as asking her about fertility advice. Becky says that Darlene deserves to have her life ruined with a new child. She also recommends that Darlene tries drunk sex in a walk in freezer. After that, Ben walks in, all of them agreeing that he should try sex with Emilio.



Special GuestEdit




The Conners: Season Two
Preemies, Weed and InfidelityA Kiss Is Just A KissThe Preemie MonologuesLanford... LanfordNightmare on Lunch Box StreetTempest in a Stew PotSlappy HolidaysLanford, Toilet of SinSmoking Penguins and Santa on Santa ActionThrowing a Christian to a BearMud Turtles, A Good Steak and One Man in a TubLive From LanfordBrothers, Babies and BreakdownsBad Dads and GradsBeards, Thrupples and RobotsTats and TiasThe Icewoman ComethPilot Lights & Sister FightsCPAPs, Hickeys and BiscuitsBridge Over Troubled Conners
Season Episode Guides

Roseanne: Season 1Season 2Season 3Season 4Season 5Season 6Season 7Season 8Season 9Season 10
The Conners: Season 1Season 2

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