Roseanne & The Conners Wiki
Roseanne & The Conners Wiki

Slappy Holidays is the seventh episode of Season 2 of The Conners, also the 18th episode overall.


Chaos ensues when Dan finally gets the entire family together for Thanksgiving dinner. Mixed feelings about the Lunch Box continue to build tension in the house, and Harris makes an unexpected move.



It looks like very few people are going to arrive for Thanksgiving. Harris will not be there without Odessa. Also, Jackie and Becky do not want to be there with Darlene. Darlene is adamant about her decision to not give The Lunch Box to them. Also, Dan is unable to cook any food.

Dan sends the kids over to get Jackie, Becky, and Becky's child for Thanksgiving. Everybody in the room knows what is going on. After moments of fake begging, Jackie and Becky agree to go but they give the kids a message for Darlene. They said that Dan paid them for his message. Jackie gives them any thing they want out of a grab bag containing Beverly's possessions.

Dan is still upset and asks Louise to come to his Thanksgiving. Since he is unable to cook any food, she says she will bring pies. She arrives in the kitchen to a table filled with mismatched dishes that D.J. told Odessa were stolen from different restaurants. Jackie is jealous of Louise's success in a garage band. Dan tells her that nobody went anywhere by twirling a rifle. Jackie apologizes but Louise rubs it in. Jackie and Becky zero in on Darlene. Jackie confronts Louise and Darlene at the same time by bringing Beverly's Mexican alcoholic beverage. She says the power of distributing the beverage at the kitchen table is just as good as managing a restaurant. It is no problem to share it with others because that is what family members are supposed to do. Darlene says it is not the same at all and tells them to leave the table but Jackie takes her coat off. Louise tells Dan to check the oven but it is still broken. Harris and Odessa watch everybody in amusement.

Their traditional V.H.S. tape broke and they have to find something else to watch. It turns out that Jackie called the station for a shout out so she could remind Darlene again. Harris and Odessa are tired of waiting for the oven to heat up so they try to leave. Harris wants to move in with Odessa who happens to be emancipated. Dan tells Harris to be quiet so Odessa leaves. Louise wants to go as well. Harris answers and says if you were born into the family then you are stuck with them. Darlene tells them that Harris is going to be trapped with Darlene forever. Becky says that Harris is more responsible than Darlene. Darlene warns Becky to stay away from Darlene's kids. Jackie defends Becky for Darlene being bossing everybody around, sleeping with two men at the same time, while her kids are neglected. She says that Roseanne can run the family but Darlene can not. Darlene says that Roseanne spent her life trying to pick up after Jackie and that Jackie was the biggest burden on Roseanne which is the real reason why Darlene is removing Jackie from the inheritance.

Jackie slapped Darlene. Harris warns Jackie but she moves in with Odessa anyways. Louise fled to the garage. After that, Dan and Darlene talk. He is completely on Darlene's side. Also, he has had enough of the fighting and nobody at the house any more. He tells Darlene that it is wrong for Jackie to be punished for the mistakes that were made in the past. Darlene protecting the family resulted in breaking them apart yet they did not even open The Lunch Box. He brings in other family members. Every one of them tell Darlene that they would rather have a restaurant than the inheritance. Jackie and Becky promise to take care of The Lunch Box. Darlene and Jackie reconcile with Jackie saying that she was angry at Beverly, not Darlene. Darlene agrees to hug but she said that it is worse than being slapped. Two of the kids promise to get along forever but Harris leaves. She says that it is much more stable at Odessa's. Dan says Harris is breaking the law. However, nobody is going to stop her because Becky is going to prevent them from stopping her. Dan said that Harris might never come back and Becky finally agrees that even she herself ran away twice but also agrees that she always comes back.

Becky talks with Darlene for a few seconds. Darlene says that she is upset and wants Becky to drink with her just this once. But since Becky is recovering and since Harris wants to run away from all the alcohol, Becky replies: "You've ruined one life tonight. Isn't that enough?".

Louise returned to tell Dan about the equal catastrophe at her place. She and Dan share her pies. Mark wants her pies as well, but Dan keeps shooing him away. Since he is just as upset as Harris is, Dan tells him to watch Dan and Louise eat pie until they eventually share with him.



Special Guest[]

DJ exclaims "Fixed the tape! Now who's ready to laugh?" from a line that was cut in the end.



  • As seen on Michael Fishman's Instagram post [1] and pictured above, The scene where Jackie slaps Darlene originally ended with DJ walking into the scene (with the tape now fixed) and exclaiming "Fixed the tape! Now who's ready to laugh?".


The Conners: Season Two
Preemies, Weed and InfidelityA Kiss Is Just A KissThe Preemie MonologuesLanford... LanfordNightmare on Lunch Box StreetTempest in a Stew PotSlappy HolidaysLanford, Toilet of SinSmoking Penguins and Santa on Santa ActionThrowing a Christian to a BearMud Turtles, A Good Steak and One Man in a TubLive From LanfordBrothers, Babies and BreakdownsBad Dads and GradsBeards, Thrupples and RobotsTats and TiasThe Icewoman ComethPilot Lights & Sister FightsCPAPs, Hickeys and BiscuitsBridge Over Troubled Conners
Season Episode Guides

Roseanne: Season 1Season 2Season 3Season 4Season 5Season 6Season 7Season 8Season 9Season 10
The Conners: Season 1Season 2Season 3Season 4